Did you ever notice that when you don’t have healthy food alternatives on hand, you’ll almost always go for the quickest, easiest, and usually worst-for-you foods?
I haven’t blogged in a few days. I was waiting for some epiphany or great awareness to write about. Didn’t happen. Isn’t life always like that? We wait for a big moment but miss the small ones in the midst. Today I decided to make some healthier snacks to have on hand. As I gathered the ingredients, I couldn’t help but relate them to my own life. (If you spell desserts backwards it spells stressed!) Yes, it’s soooo cliche.
My life is a whole bunch of ingredients. Work, therapy, family, friends, AA, yoga, etc. I have a tendency to pack them all separately in my pantry. There, they do me no good. They’re just – there. Sometimes I’m the flour – adding fluff to someone’s ego. Sometimes I’m the salt, adding salty or passive/aggressive comments. Sometimes I’m the sugar – genuinely sweet. The dough resembles my therapy – growing and expanding. And the butter – sometimes I’m cold and stiff while at other times melty and smooth. I’m realizing that it’s only when I use all my ingredients that I can create something. It may not be perfect, but it’s something. An appetizer. A side dish. A desert. A snack. However, when I try to use all of my ingredients (tools) in one sitting, I create a disastrous feast. For me, learning balance is a struggle. I’m either all in or all our. All organic ingredients or all junk food. Completely immersed or on another planet. Using many of my tools – or none at all.
I’ve been slacking with my tools – or ingredients- for the past few days. Not enough to get me into trouble, but the risk is always there. Today, I’m revisiting my list of tools and taking a few out of the box. When I become complacent is when I make unhealthy choices, which is a recipe for disaster. Not today.